Gentlemen, today marks a new President who we are sworn to protect. Mistakes have been made in the past and we want to remedy that today. Last year we had a projectile launched at the President while he was in Iraq and I am ashamed to say no one jumped in front of him to deflect it. So today we will be discussing ways to protect the President from thrown shoes.
When scanning the crowd always be alert. Of course you are looking for weapons, but also be on the lookout for anyone carrying their shoes. I realize this can present a problem in Japan, so mainly look for anyone holding their shoes at shoulder level. I realize that shoes are rarely lethal, but in some cases their odor can be overpowering, so you may want to carry a small bottle of foot powder. Now there are several ways to stop the shoe. You macho men can simply jump in front of the President and let the shoe bounce off your chest. For those of you who played football in college you can simply catch it as if it were a pass. Baseball players should be able to use a one hand grab. Whatever way you chose the most important thing is to stop it. Remember, that's your job.
If there are no questions you are dismissed. Oh, before I forget, check the schedule posted on the bulletin board outside. We are having another seminar on defending against rotten vegetables. This is mandatory. You will probably want to wear some old clothes for this.
The picture you see here is an Alaskan malamute. If that looks like a fish to you I recommend you watch Animal Planet more.
Today's question is Grade 4/World Geography.
In terms of area, what is the largest desert in Africa?
Once again I got it right and I am now 11-5.